Right up front it is important to say that churches who claim to follow Jesus Christ should demonstrate a welcoming attitude to everyone, regardless of a person’s struggles. Jesus didn’t shun and condemn social outcasts or those who lived in obvious sin. He didn’t expect crooked tax collectors or prostitutes to shed their immorality before He had anything to do with them. Instead He regularly associated with men and women who had lost their way and met them where they were at (Luke 7:36-50; 15:2).
Local churches should strive to create an atmosphere where others come to know of it as a place that cares about people despite their moral failures. While the tone of a church ought to be one of “come” not “stay away,” it is just as important for people not to mistake a message of acceptance for a message of approval. Jesus showed that you can have friendships with “sinners” without compromising your moral convictions. Not once did Jesus approve of the sinful attitudes and behaviors of those He associated with. Jesus wasn’t light on sin (John 8:11), but He knew that a person’s outward failures were also partly a symptom of an empty and wayward heart (John 4:1-42).
With the example of Jesus in mind, if a church fellowship becomes aware that a fellow Christian within their congregation is caught up in a “gay” lifestyle, their response partly depends on the attitude of that individual. There is a significant difference between someone who is okay with living in obvious sin and someone who is not.
If a person questions the validity of a “gay” identity and is troubled by their involvement in the “gay” lifestyle, then the church should come alongside and support a fellow believer in finding his way out of a harmful and empty lifestyle (James 5:19-20). Instead of condemning the person, they should reach out in concern and help the one who is struggling in finding forgiveness, freedom, and restoration.
If, on the other hand, the attitude of the person is that they have no qualms about living in a “gay” lifestyle and they have no desire or intention to do anything to change it, then they need to be lovingly confronted in a biblical manner like any other person who willingly remains in a pattern of sinful behavior (Matthew 18:15-17). Extreme cases, such as attempting to bring the lifestyle into the church body and normalizing it, may even call for an act of church discipline (1 Corinthians 5:1-5). Still, the purpose for such actions is always to be restoration not condemnation (Galatians 6:1).
